My days are slowly going back to normal. Eventually, I myself will follow.
I’m done with wallowing in tears. I’m done searching for possible explanations. I’m done torturing myself, reviewing everything that happened just to figure out what have I done wrong. I’m done not being myself. I’m done living the life that isn’t for me.
So I move forward, with everything that I learned from this nightmare.Here are the 3 things that I’ve learned from a man’s disappearing act.
1.It’s not about what we deserve.
Lately I came to realize that when such things happen, it is not about ‘deserving’. We often do things thinking that a good act done will attract a good act in return. It’s not about how nice we are, how long our patient is, how true is the love we’ve given. After all, we can’t control the other person’s thoughts. Everything that happens in our lives, good or bad, is as real as our existence. It is felt, it is seen, it leaves a mark. So love truly, give freely, smile joyfully and if these aren’t given back atleast we were real. At that very moment, we were a part of the other person’s reality.
Being a part of their lives, no matter how brief, is one of the simple joys of life cuz we remain in their memories.
2. Accept the reality that some people were not meant to stay in your life, worse some don’t even have the guts to say goodbye.
Need I say more? We will not always get the answers that we seek, maybe not in this lifetime. But maybe, it is better of that way. It is for our own good. Deep in our hearts we know that if someone really wants a place in your life, they will find a way. And if someone wants out, they could simply walk away, without a hint or two. It is one reality that is hard to accept but we must.
3. Remember who you are without them.
For it is time to un-glue the attachment (of all forms). My family did not even recognize me anymore. My mom missed her child a lot, she missed my smiles. I missed myself too. My frequent times of solitude. I just miss myself without you. I got so caught up with scheduling my daily life just to get the chance to talk to you and your ghosting act just made me realize how dumb I was to do that. I will not go to the same cafe, I will not go out at the same time during mornings, I will forget the life that I created around you.
Hushed Noise 